People who are able to hold the tension between two conflicting demands, without feeling forced to choose between the two, can be said to have a paradox mindset. Those who utilize such a mindset have been shown to exhibit greater levels of creativity, adaptability, and productivity. But doing this is not easy. Our minds have evolved over the millennia to make either/or choices, to move to resolution, to “fix” things quickly by making choices. The growing complexity of the world makes using a paradox mindset even more uncomfortable, and at the same time, it makes the skill even more critical and valuable. The tension we see in many organizations between profitability and sustainability is a clear example of the elevated stakes we face today. Modern leaders who fail to deliver on financial goals may pay with the loss of their jobs. Yet leaders who fail to deliver on sustainability goals may pay with the loss of our species. Yes, we need leaders with a paradox mindset.
The core skills that leaders build on their compassionate leadership journey are also key to unlocking the capacity to embrace paradox. In their recent book Both/And Thinking, Wendy K. Smith and Marianne W. Lewis clearly establish the importance of a paradox mindset in our complex world. As they report, the evidence-based benefits of such an approach are significant. Here we examine three fundamental practices of compassionate leadership – awareness and inner compassion, ability to communicate compassionately, and recognition of the value of diverse perspectives – to help you target your development in ways that support your capacity to embrace paradox.
Awareness and Inner Compassion
One of the first steps required to embrace paradox thinking is to be able to name both parts of an underlying tension. Doing so non-judgmentally requires an anchored presence and a strong open-hearted attention to simply name what is. The compassionate leadership journey begins with awareness, and the practice of awareness is ever-present. Begin your practice of a paradox mindset by recommitting to any practice you use to support and deepen your awareness.
Our deeply ingrained desire to resolve tension means that holding paradox may trigger fear, anxiety, and other forms of unease. When these negative emotions become overwhelming, it can lead to denying or burying the conflict that arises in the face of paradox. Skillful compassionate leaders understand, from their anchored internal grounding, how to remain calm and steady in the midst of tension. Their emotional resilience supports them in returning to a place that leads to non-judgmental examination and wise action in the midst of the conflict, rather than denial or suppression.
Compassionate Communications
The value of holding paradox arises from the new ideas and creativity that emerge when contrasting significantly different approaches. The disadvantage of this is that the different approaches will create conflict if they are framed in terms of winning and losing. Compassionate leaders practice conflict resolution and are well equipped to hold alternative views in the same space constructively. They know how to simultaneously affirm the benefits and name the weaknesses of multiple approaches and keep the dialogue focused on larger goals and deeper purpose.
At the heart of compassionate communications is listening. Compassionate leaders model good listening and support their team in understanding how to listen to those with other viewpoints. Central to this practice is consistent caring and respect for those with different views. The ability to affirm the ideas of someone who disagrees with you feels like a lost art in today’s polarized world. A leader with a paradox mindset, on the other hand, communicates in a unifying way.
Valuing Diverse Perspectives
Much has been written about the issue of offering lip service to diversity and belonging while not acting in meaningful ways to truly practice inclusion. The difference between substantial efforts to create belonging for everyone and insincere empty statements will be revealed instantly when the tension created by paradox arises. Communications around the tension of conflicting demands requires true caring and respect for others. In organizations with a healthy culture of belonging, that respect exists, and conflict dialogue can flow with a sense of safety and support. If diversity efforts have been put in place as a thin veneer, the shallowness will be revealed at the first sign of conflict.
Compassionate leaders commit to and embody safety and belonging for all. When they do, everyone has an opportunity to thrive, and to have their ideas heard. The individual thriving leads to organizational thriving, and competitive advantage arises through improved creativity, higher employee engagement, and lower turnover.
In closing…
The evidence is clear. Compassionate leaders are more effective leaders and lead teams that produce superior results. The evidence is also clear that embracing paradox leads to organizational benefits. The overlap between the ideals of compassionate leadership and a paradox mindset – strong awareness and inner compassion, compassionate communications, and celebrating diverse points of view – are undoubtedly behind the benefits that accrue in both practices.